Saturday, August 31, 2013

"What the World need's now, is L[]VE sweet L[]VE"


Tuesday, August 27, 2013

~Nevermind~" Y[]UR T[]RTURING ME"

~[]MG~ We have a common saying around here, only You have to say it [with that Philly, Jersey, New York TWANG] "Y[]UR T[]RTURING ME" ........ Y[]U, have been put through the wringer with me / this makes Y[]U FAMILY~Y[]U heard of candy land, well welcome to CRAZY LAND= And I am Your T[]UR GUIDE= S[] at the advise of my Loved ones, They say CALL = make sure/ So I CALL, the inspectors office/ yeah []MG~ MY APP[]I[]NTMENT, is next WEDNESDAY, Sept the 4th~ Thanking G[]D []UT L[]UD! = Y[]UR DEALING with a crazy woman here....FEAR`makes me talk out loud, when I should just be quiet! [See/ I have another WEEK!~ I've just been T[]RTUING Y[]U= Let me make You, some some cinnimon rolls, and sweet tea= to make it up to Y[]U =L[]L/Laughing out loud!~NEVERMIND~

Monday, August 26, 2013


~You the expression "what doe'nt kill you, makes you stronger".....It get tiring being strong, yet it is part of our survival skills. And when we need too "we can do anything, we set our mind too.~" I posted a note, on my bathroom mirror, and may sound silly= but it works.[Your life depend's on it] I must complete ,these tasks because, my life does depend on it....And I know, a good part of it is fear. Yet, I've been homeless before. And depending on others, is not one of my strongest features...... So it is fear, that drives me right now... Passing inspection, can be the difference/ as they say a deal braker....Completed another wall of painting, one stone at a time.... And all the while in my solace, I know in the end= my indepdence is crumbling before my eyes....This body can't make the climb, the way it once did.....I'm being swept away, perhaps dimensia will take me first, I always said " in my madness I will be painting= in glitter gown. It only hangs in my closet, and never see's light".[No doubt I'll be wearing one shoe......Seem's I can never find the other] I believe their is a hint of madness in us all....Can't wait till this is over.= There orchastra going on inside my head,crazy our most brillant works [comes to us, when there' hardly time for it]= those dreams, songs, painting, and novels will just have to wait....Doodles I call them, like this piece below. Just a doodle, I can do so much better....I just need more time=W[]MAN"I pray for more time, this isn't how it suppose to end..... I've become "my own ghost."

~A thousand miles~ [Vanessa Carlton]

Normally this kinda of task, would not be so much of a strain= theses days if I brush my hair, it's a task. Learning to eccept these thing's I cannot change......Well I've turned the curve, on the room.~ Making Progress,one corner at a time.~
~[]ne thing I've reccognize is my children, have been so eccepting. And I have been the one in the dark, like other people that knew me before= keep expecting the person I was, to appear..... I now know better, what You see is what You get.~Take it, or leave it....I can't get out of my own way= I aid to my family "it's like waking up from a coma, or a bad dream....Only it's permanent,and that's []K, i have well ronded people in my CIRCLE, and they L[]VE ME [NO MATTER WHAT] see ya soon, My Village [X[]x]
~" A Beautiful Morning "~[ the Rascals]

Sunday, August 25, 2013

~ my Ugly shoe syndrome~

You would be proud, I sorted through the clothes, and things I have been saving for the store [and rid of them]~You know that little lie we tell ourselves "I'll have a yard sale" []k= my neighbors, asked are you moving, did someone die. I felt like saying me, well It feels like it when I look at all my pretty high heels, and they have'nt left the house is more than a year now."I'M JUST SAYING" makes me kinda of moody... [But you know I did'nt get rid of them, heck they look pretty just sitting there]~FOR NOW, I've been waering , what call my ugly shoes.... So anyway I had talked to my Doctor, and procedure is canceled.=I'm running a low grade fever, but wait I coughed while we're talking ~He say's " You need to reschedule. I say "it's just alleregies. He says "coughing,or sneezing are FROWNED UPOND, during an epidirail,on your spine....[]k, so realy, he had to make me think that can happen....So lately it's been BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION= that I walk around,and talk out loud to myelf....My Daughter says this to me, I'm so use to being around the babies, I do I talk out loud. And at the grocery store, I talk to everyone...I just do~And if you ate dinner with me,I would probly attempt to cut up, your food. So I've been taking this anti-depressant, that seems to make me chatty, and I've been having nightmares. Vivid ones, well enough about me. I must get back, to sorting= I'm celerating TRASH NIGHT! Thank for being there,you know if you ever need to talk= write me @t /we'll talk soon.....Love Mother

~Reality check~[Pennies from Heaven]

~In my case it was my GrandMom, we called her Nanny, she is in Heaven. Every where I step, I've finding pennies. My Daughter sent me, this photo weeks ago. I use to have a store called " pennies from heaven"....And through time, as I've said ~ I want open a store again/ aka Jabip Village.... My Duaghter came to visit me the other day, and if you don't Know= my Landlord, and the township are inspecting my apartment....Tues, or Wednesday [ I wrote it down somewhere].....My point is I've been saving racks, folding chairs " with the mind set of build it , and they will come". Well my Daughter said the most honest thing to me " Mom it look's like your a hoarder", so need less to say/thank God it's my trash night~[ I realy must let these things G[]! ] They are only taking up space, sometimes the truth hurts....But my opening a store, in my present condition~ is un-realistic...... So out the door it goes, not to mention, I have a fever, and have lost the rest of my mind.... I'm sure to make some scrapper, quite happy.... Letting it go, reality check.....[God will help me, when the time is right]

Saturday, August 24, 2013

~feel like=LIQUID MERCURY rising~

~I will be in my little corner of , my W[]RLD~

~In trying to accomplish,these tasks set before me. My PTSD is coming out full swing.... My body, is hardly capeable of what's expected of me.....I will not be posting on Google +. the next couple of days. I can feel the change in me, I will suclude myself, to my blog.... See you after this surge passes......It' like being a wolf, with a full moon.....[this kind of pain, changes me]~

~Rush Hour on Encore~@t 4:05

[CHECK []UT]=Jacie Chan, and Chris Tucker in Rush hour[comedy], gonna get some funny on while I finish painting my sitting room....[ENJOY]

~Jimi Hendrix~ [purple haze]

~APPRECATI[]N~ I have great apprecation, for LIFE! Every day when I wake, although my body screams with pain. And trembles so much, it's hard to hit these key's to write. I've become so grateful, just to sit up, an set my feet to floor. You know that feeling, when you've just flown on an airplane. And your flown, through a thunder storm in the sky....That feeling you get, when you land, you almost want to run down, and kiss the ground. That surge of, thankiing God your alive.... That's how I feel....So excuse me , while I kiss the sky![X[]x]
~Make someone you L[]VE pancakes today.....In my family, I'm famous for my bananna pancakes,in color of the rainbow. And a side of green eggs, and ham. Make sweet a memory today, be sure to let your loved one, know they are loved.....Be the best You, you can be. Fairy tales can come true, and start with! Love Mother [X[]x]

~Firestarter on Encore~

~Drew Barrymore, and George C. Scott in a thriller. I'm still up painting walls......Enjoy

Friday, August 23, 2013

~Bronx tale~

~On the spike channel=with Robert DeNero, and Chazz Palminteri [ENJOY]

~Lydia,and MeMom @t Shoprite~

Some people go parting, on Friday night. "I go to Shoprite".... See ya soon X[]x
L[]VE is everywhere, You L[][]K! We just have to []PEN,our HEART's X[]x" It's all in []UR PERSPECTIVE"

Thursday, August 22, 2013

~Roger Hodgson [give alittle bit]~[L[]VE is a thousand times stronger]

My Love, You are here, and I am here. And I don't feel so all alone~Well~ I'm up on my feet again, and have mountains to move. We are all like flower, frail. Yet given the chance~ We will grow, like I said I have so much to complete before I close my eyes Sunday night. My procedure is scheduled Monday, and the inspection, on my apartment is Tuesday, or Wednesday [determined on how I feel] ~And as I mentioned , I was pulling out my closet to sort out, what fits, and my now suits my life style...Oh , and I know this weird , but I marked at the base of my skull, where the nerves are pinched....So I can better explain to the doctor~And my Baby Sister is taking me, I must say lately " I feel helpless, it's not a fimilar feeling to me. I'm use to taking care, of everyone else [But I'm sure God is trying to teach me something, about myself. And I must be paitent, and learn. I am putty in his hands, so I must= "I say give alittle bit"
~And when your crazy, and you were'nt this crazy before= You know the difference~ I pray God, still alows me to grow my dreams, but for now I have mountains to move...."be back soon" It's nice to know Your there, it's nice to know you care8 Thank You :) [X[]x]~God isn't finished with me YET!
`A special Thanks to freinds at Google +, for the photo's... And You tube, for allowing me "to express myself with song'

~Carole King~[ I feel the earth move under my feet]

~MeMom's Monkey [Travis]

~Travis ,and Mommy came over for a visit. Filled with Dragons,trains, and floppy [his favorite bunny] The circle of life, his Mommy had a bunny, when she was little....[As you can see , he does'nt sit still for long~I sent them home early, I'm like radar from mash, I can feel the rumble under my feet. There are storms in the area...And I did'nt want them traveling in bad weather~ THANKING GOD=OUTLOUD!

~Until we meet again~

[Sandra Bullock in]

~Miss Congeniality 2, just started on lifetime~still painting X[]

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

~Big Black Horse,and the Cherry Tree~

~L[]VE is all we NEED!~

~L[]VE is everywhere, I look....I have a GR8 day planned tomarrow with my babies, til them I paint. Thi mare, she ain't what she use to be....I pray for strength.
~gonna go make my sweet tea, see ya soon X[]x

~Micheal, the angel on Encore~

~I lit acandle. I pray for [PEACE], I pray for [STRENGTH], I pray for [Y[]U, as You pray for [ME]......I paint, and watch Michael....x[]x

~May today be, a better day~[START AGAIN]

~Can anyone else see the face/this where I left off. Must finish what I began~back to the drawing board~ [May today be a better day]~ I think I'm done crying,see ya soon....[X[]x]

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

~Cry Baby~

[]nce again, your my compass. I have surgery scheduled for Monday,and now Landlord want to come in along with the municapal...To see to to it, that I painted my apartmen, per agreement....When my health, has bee crap,and now I having my ass handed to me=because I have to have this apartment finished paint, by Sunday night= before my procreedure on [Monday]...Well I feel like crying, and I'm gonna let myself.....I just pulled out all my closet's to ort throught crap for store, that may never happen~


Monday, August 19, 2013

We are going to do a live Google + hang out!

Or at least try [X[]x]

~Going []UT with my Grandbabies, to find NEM[]~

~looking forward to 4pm tomarrow,my Loves ordered the wire for rock band=we will be jamming. But for now, I need rest [ I have'nt been myself...]Until tomarrow, much L[]VE,and Prayer to Y[]U ALL X[]x.Ps. I will take photo's of our character's, and in the future , look into playing on line= Sweet Dreams,my Village.

Sunday, August 18, 2013


IS on channel TCM = starts @t 11pm= NOW!

~Finding Forrester~

Starting @t 8pm on encore :is Finding Forrester= Enjoy!

~Just in case [X[]x]~

As You know from the reading of my blog,I have PTSD.... Many years ago Three Amazing people were killed,on their way to our house for Thankgiving....My Mom alway's say's "that's where it started, my anxiety= hense PTSD. They say was in shock, but my kept moving [planning three funnerals]....What I most remember is walking in their house, late that night " there were two empty cups of tea, in the sink, with tea bags still in them". As if they thought, we'll get to that, when we get back. And of course, cleaning out there belongings.[ It was so tragic, it has changed me for life.] So to be honest with myself, and this may sound morbit,[but that's why I'm cleaning out my things]~Everyday I wake up, and feel no better than the day before. Well maybe it is anxiety, but I've collected little things along the way= to turn into art. I so feel frail, and frightened. And I know " I sure don't want my loved ones, to have to come in , and try make sense of my mess.. Like I said, the other day I'm scheduled for another epidurial.....And my love ones say "I'm just being silly, and that be so.....So, we'll say it's for the "sake of just in case". Besides I have been kinda of messy...We'll talk soon, until then....Love Alezia X[]xThank's for being there, I always feel better [know your there]PS. The 2nd Saturday, of September my painting's are going into a gallery, so I pray God give's me the strength to paint [better pieces] Amen!